Friday the 13th (1980)

This is going to be the best summer ever you guys! YEAH! 

Horny teenagers running around in their skivvies never prosper. This is a very valuable lesson you should take away from this movie. The FDA does not want you doing that shit! Friday the 13th is pure, slasher fun. It's the classic "Teenagers being picked off one by one by a serial killer in the woods" movie. No one's winning an Oscar for this, and no one's trying to. That's whats so great about this movie.

You can totally tell who's going to get slashed!

The movie is about six camp counselors going to Camp Crystal Lake on Friday, June 13, 1980 to help prepare it for kids that were coming to stay for the summer. These campgrounds have a dark history that soon begins to resurface not long after they arrive. One by one the counselors face their doom by an unknown killer with an ax to grind.

Gurl... you're hitchhiking in hick country! You're begging to be murdered! Dumb whore.

About 80% of the people in this film end up being brutally murdered in their underwear. It's pretty fucking fantastic. If you have two hours to spare, you have to watch it. Today, the cheesy dialogue and over-the-top cliches are just entertaining to watch. Watching the slasher films of today, I can totally see how this movie inspired them.

Bye Felicia!

Following the success of John Carpenter's amazing, groundbreaking hit Halloween (1978), other people wanted a piece of the very profitable horror/slasher genre. The film was directed and produced by Sean Cunningham who had formerly worked with Wes Craven on The Last House on the Left, something he wanted to distance himself from. Cunningham was greatly inspired by Halloween, He wanted to make a movie that was scary, visually exciting, shocking and make people laugh. He succeeded.

When a creepy old man tells you that you're going to die if you stay. You betta leave.

Victor Miller, who has gone on to write for many prominent soap operas, wrote the script. He later was extremely unhappy with how the Friday the 13th franchise went with the direction of the story. You can tell I'm writing this paragraph very carefully because I don't want to give anything away. I saw this movie for the first time when I was 10 years old and the ending blew my tits off! I don't want to ruin it for anyone else, though everyone probably knows it by now... thanks Obama.

It's okay Kevin Bacon, they're just checking you for fever.

If you're one of those kids who can't appreciate dated movies, then fuck off. This movie isn't for you. Go watch the shitty re-make with that Supernatural asshole in it. This movie is a classic! If it weren't for this shitty slasher movie, we wouldn't have many of the shitty slasher movies we have today, so sit the fuck down! I don't want to hear anyone bitching!

She's going to have a hell of a hangover.

The movie is definitely worth a viewing, even if you've already seen it, revisit Crystal Lake. Jump on in, the water is perfect...

So serene...

To learn more about this amazing slasher film, visit the IMDB page.